cloud nevermind

*sigh*

My RE's office called yesterday (out of the blue) to notify me of the
IVF Seminar that was last night! She said it was there at the office
and did we want to come? Um, hell yeah!!! This is where he gives away
a free ivf c, of course I wanna go. I told her to count us in. I was
stoked!! That's when y'all got the short, but excited post. I didn't
realize at the time, but I'm sure you all that I got a BFP. So sorry I
got your hopes up.

We never made it to the seminar. Saying I was disappointed would be an
understatement, to say the least. We got to his office 30 minutes
early. We sat in the truck for a little bit and watched people working
out in the gym across the street. We decided to go ahead and go in
early so I could go to the restroom. We stepped out of the elevator
and saw his office door was boarded up. Weird, but I thought maybe
they had made a new entrance and there was a sign by where the door
use to be that said that suite was down the hall..... Well, the door
down there had a WARNING sign on it something about "watch for fires"
so clearly a construction site rather than my RE's office.

Starting to fret a little, I call their office but of course it was
after 5 so no one answered. I had this other number for my RE and I
always assumed it was his cell phone. Seeing that I felt it was an
emergency I called it. Turns out it was his house number. Yay, I have
my RE's home number, but boo no one answered so no help there.

I tried googling him to see if the office had moved but it said we
were at the right place. I was starting to feel like I was on the cusp
of my dream but I could feel it slipping out of my grip at the same
time. Still determined not to give up, I said let's go to another
floor and maybe someone will know where he moved to. So here we are
going down a hall full of locked doors! Agh it was so frusterating. It
was kinda like a horror movie in the sense that you need to find a
open door to escape but every single door was closed. But wait, I see
an office with lights on and I hear voices. Sure it's the cornea place
but maybe just maybe they know where the heck my dr moved to. A lady
in there starts looking it up on the computer. It takes a little bit
and then about the time she finds it she says that she wonders if he
moved to the other hospital that a lot of the gyn's moved to. Sure
enough he did, luckily it was only a few blocks away. So we walk all
the way back to the truck in the rain, oh yeah you got to add rain
into the mix. That always helps, NOT!

We arrive at what we think is the correct building(and keep in mind we are already 10 minutes late) only to find out we still do not have the correct office. *SIGH* At this point we are both extremely frusterated, its raining, I can't run to the truck because stupid me wore heals and if I ran I would most definitely fall into the biggest puddle.....So we were both getting soaked and more aggrevated. It is now, 6:20pm, and I finally told J to forget it. It just wasn't working out as planned.

I wanted to go so bad. I was feeling really optimistic and I hadn't been that happy in a while. I miss that smiling for no reason other than happiness feeling.

I called my RE's office this morning and gave her the short version of last night and she apologized, said she was so sorry, since we talk all the time she didn't realize I had never been to their new office. I got the address and directions for future use and she said she would notify me of the next one. I asked her to please tell my RE that we didn't flake out on him last night, we really wanted to be there, but we never could find the place. She said, she would tell him and that is probably gonna make him feel really bad. And I'm sure he will, cause he has a big heart for what he does and he genuinly cares for his patients. I don't want him to feel bad, I just didn't want him to think we didn't show after we said we would be there.

I am sorry I got all your hopes up. I know what you must have been thinking. And for future reference, when I get my bfp, I will not torment you with a quick post like yesterday's. So Sorry!